Saturday, December 13, 2008

Tenderized

I am not sleeping much lately. There's excitement about my family coming. I'm panicking about the many things I forgot to do that day. I'm listening to the new sounds of our newly-inside-dwelling cat, crashing into the wall near my bed as she races back and forth with her invisible friend in the dark. Mostly, I'm worrying - about friends' troubles, or the homeless, or whether Nicolas is happy. I wish that I could be like sometime insomniacs Barbara Kingsolver and Rue Kream and get out of bed each night to write a great book. Maybe tonight.

Lack of sleep has softened me. The professional production of A Christmas Carol that we saw last night (our friends in it included two acclaimed young unschooled brothers) had me in tears over Scrooge's redemption. That was unexpected. I even acted in this play, years ago in Boston and was cynically burned out on Christmas carols for years. This year, just a few notes of Johnny Mathis and I well up. And, this particular production is great. If you are local, and can get there, I believe that even those less tender would love it.

This morning, I saw a branch out of a window and was touched by the way the wind moves its leaves, that there are just a few less of the red flutters every day.
I deleted the earlier published rambling about having lost my checkbook at the theater, and my "excuses of an insomniac" for having done so, because I found said checkbook between the seats of our car. Life is bittersweet but the emphasis today has gotten sweeter. I'm going to be a presenter at the Northeast Unschooling Conference, which means I'm bringing my family for a visit home to Boston at the end of August! I hope that some of you will be there, to pump me full of tylenol pm or mundane thoughts late at night and share a wicked good time. Do Bostonians still say wicked?

13 comments:

Wonderworking Words said...

Hi, I'm new to your blog but I love it. Thanks for being so personal about unschooling, natural foods, etc. It's always good to find like minded people on the web.

Take care,
KristenM
www.foodrenegade.com

Unknown said...

I love your post (because I know how you feel) and Bostonians do still say wicked. I think it's wicked awesome that you will all be up north a bit next summer! Do I hear the seabirds calling your names?

Jodi said...

I bet you're so excited about seeing your family. Sometimes counting the breath backwards can be a great way to settle and calm. inhale 54, exhale 54, inhale 53, exhale 53 ... and so on

Pam said...

Do Bostonians still say wicked? <<<<

In Maine we still do.
Pam

Sara said...

I saw wicked now, and try to bite my tongue in conversations with midwesterners when it's the natural thing to say! Love your post too. As I've been going through finals this year I've actually been oversleeping not undersleeping which is a new experience and a different type of problem. I've noticed that I'm not as weepy as I normally would be under the circumstances.

kris laroche said...

hi there...where in montana do you have family? thanks for sharing your sweet life with us...and what will you be presenting at unschooling conference?
with love, kris
www.naturalparentingcenter.com
www.feeleez.com

Madeline Rains said...

It makes me feel far less old knowing that "wicked" isn't history. Persephone, I do hear the seabirds calling my name. sigh. Imagine if we could fit B.I. in as well. wow.

Jodi, I am grateful for the advice and will use it tonight. I was hoping for a new tip such as this.

It's good to see more familiar, and new names here. Kris, it has not been decided what I'll be presenting - our unschooling truth in one form or another. I enjoyed visiting your site. The writings of Joseph Chilton Pierce helped lead us onto this path.

mindy said...

OMG!!!! Presenter...woo-hoo!!! So happy for you, but sorry for your sleepless nights. Love to you all!

jfrancis said...

The red disappears
with the days
as the wind
wears away
their attachment
to life.

Tamar Orvell said...

What helps me fall asleep when in an insomniac flare-up state (like now, when I am NOT finding affordable rental housing in Tel Aviv for a couple months.... grrrr....) is loading up the iPod and listening... It's like having a story read to me (I listen to Teaching Company courses, lectures, interviews... that kind of thing, so I hear spoken voices, not singing). Try it! Happy holidays and if I don't get back before then, happy new year!

Mata said...

Hi Madeline
I often read your blog to follow how you and your family enjoy every day. I will be reading it even more eagerly after I drove with your Australian family to Sydney airport. They are on the way to a family reunion Christmas in your home.Wishing everyone a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Year, love
Sylvia

gail said...

Looks like we may just have to make a trip up to Boston. You will just be a fabulous speaker at the conference! And keep that book in mind to write. Hope to see you all again very soon.

Madeline Rains said...

Tamar, I will try that ipod method tonight. I am having very full, wonderful days with all th evisiting family but still have insomnia. Thanks.

Sylvia, thanks for commenting! I hope you and your family are having a wonderful day together. It's so good to see Naomi, Kenneth and Zoe here!

Gail, I sure hope you'll be there in MA! That would be fantastic! btw, your profile pic is amazing.